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Turning Over New Leaf

Thursday, October 23, 2014

It’s Good To Be King

tut


No. It is not Tom Petty. At one time, some might have envied this young man. Imagine ascending to the throne with all the power in the world at your fingertips. Riding around in chariots with the young girls throwing flowers at his feet, he must have been sitting at the top of the Pyramid of life, right? Probably not. He could never climb that high with his cane.

The envy of everyone in the desert is none other than King Tutankhamun. British scientists performing a “virtual autopsy” report that His Majesty was not a chic magnate. He actually had a few problems most likely caused by the brother-sister relationship between his parents. The Pharaoh was thought for centuries to have died in a chariot crash at age nineteen. He most likely never rode in one.

Despite his feminized features, enlarged breasts, buck teeth, and a club foot, Gwyneth Paltrow was quoted as saying, “You’re so handsome that I can’t speak properly.” Tut, Tut.

16 comments:

  1. Hahahahaha. I thought you were going to solve the mystery of his death (since the chariot was ruled out).

    When I read that bit about Gwyneth... and it cluttered up my "news" feed for days... I thought I'd gag. Her popularity plummeted after an article came out where she said that feeding her kids wholesome, good food was very important to her. She didn't let them eat junk (candy and processed food). America didn't like that and put her on the pariah list.

    All you have to do is praise the king to get back on top. Go Gwyneth! (Does anyone still doubt that the press completely manipulates what we read and see???? When is this sort of thing NEWS that clutters up the feed for days and days???????)

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    1. Robin: Artificial Intelligence stands no chance against Natural Stupidity.

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  2. I read about this. Very fascinating stuff.

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    1. Miranda: Who knows what they will find next year.

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  3. A few years ago a dear friend, my daughter and I rode by way of Amtrak from St. Paul to Chicago, and we saw him at the Field Museum! We skipped his show here in St. Paul, but it's a very worthy visit if you ever get the opportunity. I've posted (that visit) about him here, a long while back. How is the fishing? Anything mentionable yet?

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    1. Karen: Oh yes. I saw the exhibit as well. Fabulous! The fishing has not kicked in yet. My secret, which is slowly leaking out, is that we are in the process of moving. I will be posting about it soon.

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  4. He doesn't look anything like Steve Martin.

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    1. Joeh: That's right. I'm still waiting for Stevie Wonder to look a little more like Eddie Murphy.

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  5. All news to me--Tut's physical disabilities, Gwynth's incidental comments--about food and kings and whatever else she might have twittered. Love your new, upbeat layout! The lack of clutter lets the written word stand out. Bravo.

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    1. Linda: Tut's problems are new to everybody. Gweneth has her own problems and now everyone knows. Thanks for the kind words on the new look.

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  6. King Tut, obviously we barely knew ye. Poor guy.

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  7. Dear JJ,
    I had to look up the results, old and new, of the BBC report. I saw two exhibitions on Tut: in Munich and in Hildesheim, where the local museum's director had found out that the word "gold" in the title of an exhibition was a sure way to success. (Your beautiful new blog-header is pointing into the right direction!)
    As a philologist I am Old School: a piece of Art must be able to exist without the biography of the artist. I had the chance (consciously avoiding the word 'luck') to meet quite a lot of modern poets - some were beautiful, most were not - in that case I would have preferred to read their passionate love poems without having to watch their creators :-)
    So: poor Tut. Reminds me of the short story of J. Peter Hebel, "Kannitverstan" - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kannitverstan.
    As to Gwyneth: I think we should be very glad to have something to eat. In my diet I steer a middle course, and am bored to death by health-food cranks and their litany about what they eat, - but mostly what not - and what we should eat. I do as I please.

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  8. Hi JJ .. interesting read - the British Museum have an exhibition on at the moment where they've looked inside Egyptian Mummies that they hold in the Museum ... it's incredible what they're able to find and find out about ... science is fascinating when we can learn so much.

    Good luck with the moving and re-alignment re writing .. seems all is going in the right positive direction .. cheers Hilary

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  9. Inbreeding. *shudders*

    I'm just blown away by how much they can surmise from the remnants. Mind-blowing! I also love how human it makes us all. We tend to put some of these people in history up on a pedestal when in truth, they were just as limited and anxious about life as us.

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  10. I'm sorry I missed his exhibit at the Field Museum, and hope to catch it next time. It is astounding how much new information has come out about King Tut. I also like your new look, JJ! Good luck with your move!

    Julie

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  11. That's why I've always been convinced that the real beauty of a person is in the inside, and from there it can attract the ones who are willing to appreciate that inner beauty that is the only beauty that really matters.
    Interesting post.

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