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Turning Over New Leaf

Friday, October 31, 2014

Puff the Magic Dragon

marijuana costume


Why buy your child a dragon costume for Halloween? Children must learn to be open-minded. Rumor has it that the age of reason has now been changed to three years so four-year olds might have the option to quit kindergarten and move to Colorado.

I cannot think of a better way to work at parenting than the new marijuana costume that will debut nationwide this Halloween. Don’t neglect your parental duties. Why waste time at PTA meetings when you should be hurrying down to the local high school for nighttime adult education classes covering subjects like “Rolling Weed with Tots” or “Helping Pothead Teens Memorize Miranda Warnings.”

Let’s face it. Your daughter might not be Honey Boo Boo. She might choose to star in “Cops” by age fourteen. You would feel like a terrible failure if you had to head to the police station in the middle of the night to read the charges to your illiterate seventeen-year old. We should allow our children the freedom America affords them. Help them to think on their own. Show them how to blame their friends instead of you.

I can think of no better way than the new marijuana costume for the holiday season.  And as a special bonus, each parent will receive a certificate from the Environmental Protection Agency after Halloween because the green costume will safely go up in smoke – much like your child’s future.

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10 comments:

  1. Maybe not a very good choice.

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  2. The chairman of the Green Party in Germany, Cem Özdemir, this year filmed himself on his balcony for an Icebucket Challenge - forgetting that he filmed his well-developed marihuany weed too that was for most viewers the real star of the youtube-video... (In Germany it is illegal to grow pot, even in pots). That happened end of August - he should have waited till Halloween!

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    1. Britta: It makes me sad to see Germany having similar problems to ours. The world is changing and it amazes me to read about how many people think it is for the better. We need common sense.

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  3. You'll have to see my post today, it's a must! May I say I adore that song, (putting on youtube as I write this) it always brings back fishing on our boat with my oldest son as the cassette played on our boat. Not such great fishing, but best memories ever.

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    1. Karen: Sounds great. I'll take a look.

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  4. I think the direction of society manifests in several ways, including Halloween costumes. Ever feel like you're just rearranging chairs on a ship that's going down?

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    1. Robin: Every day. I just decided the best I can do is make a joke out of it, or at least be as sarcastic as hell.

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  5. Had this costume been around when I was a kid, I have no doubt my constantly bong-sucking and otherwise preoccupied with dumping crap into her system parent would have certainly found it hilarious to dress me up in it. The fact that many people in general now find this acceptable is just sick. Would these people dress their kids up as a beer can? Probably... I'll just pray for a pendulum swing and try to keep my humor about me. It's good to see that you have!

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    1. Jasmine: Just keep thinking straight. If you do, there is hope.

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