Kidnapping on IO


IO

By now, everyone has heard about the three kidnapped girls rescued today after ten years in captivity.

As you know, we will now get inundated with ridiculous opinions about the handling of the matter, the rights of the offenders, the trial of the case, and the appropriate sentencing. I know this is not my home planet, so I thought I would share how they handle it on IO, my domicile, and one of Jupiter’s moons.

Several millennia ago, in order to form a more perfect union than the rest of the universe, the folks on IO established what they called a Constitution. The document set forth the supreme laws of our culture, and the people agreed to actually adhere to it. In fact, that’s why our society endured for several millennia.

In any event, the Founders of IO added Amendments to their Constitution they called A Bill of Rights, and the citizens of the moon followed those provisions as well. Here is how this case would be handled on my planet, applying the law as written:


Amendment 4: This provision guarantees that the people of IO will be free from “unreasonable searches and seizures.” No problem in this case, because when the victim escapes and tells the authorities what happened, resulting in the freeing of other victims, the subsequent searches are reasonable.

Amendment 5: This provision assures the people of IO that in accordance with due process of law, the charges would be sent to a Grand Jury, one time, and the offender shall not “be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself” - Period! 

Amendment 6: On IO, unlike most other societies in the universe, “the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury.” This process would take six months, not four years because there are no Bulls on IO to drop their manure into our legal system.
 
The accused is also informed of the charges filed, which takes five minutes on IO, and has a right to confront the witnesses against him at trial. The accused does not have the right to take the deposition of the arresting police officers over the course of five years to determine whether the cops ever did anything in high school with a member of the opposite sex in the back seat of a Chevy, because the arresting officers did not commit the crime.

And here is the “Biggy,” as they call it on IO: The accused is entitled “to have the assistance of counsel for his defense.” On my planet, that is not interpreted as a Dream Team compiled for the sole purpose of circumventing justice, permitting monsters to continue to prey upon society, while the taxpayers pay millions of dollars countering spurious defenses such as “My client ate too many Twinkies,” or “My client suffered from Urban Stress Syndrome.”


Following the trial in accordance with the Constitution, if the defendant is found guilty, the lawyers on IO have a tough job. You see, if the offenders actually kidnapped those girls and held them against their will for ten years, they will never again see Mother Jupiter. The decision to be argued by reasonable people on IO is whether the guilty parties are imprisoned for life or are executed for their crimes. On IO, life in prison means a criminal goes to prison for life. It does not mean seven years or finding Jesus in his cell, whichever comes first. Also, execution means terminating the criminal’s life, not providing him with room and board in isolation for fifteen to twenty years. The Death Penalty, indeed, is a tough question for the people of IO to resolve. They do it by popular vote, instead of the political whim of a judge or prosecutor.

I am not suggesting that IO is perfect. I do suggest, however, that their system is far better than that under which the offenders in today’s kidnapping case will meet justice. Then again, on Earth, they have Bulls.

 

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Comments

  1. That sounds remarkably like the place where I used to live...

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    1. Susan: I hope for the sake of my children and grandchildren that we can return home someday.

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  2. One of the reasons I'm relieved to be retired from law....

    What began with good intentions and offered worthy protections has been warped into a system that has lost touch with common sense.

    I'm reminded of one of my favorite passages, from Another Roadside Attraction. Whenever one of the characters would tune into the news, "The world situation was desperate, as usual."

    I guess that's why I don't watch the news anymore, either (although I did see the headlines about the girls who were found--good news there!).

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    1. Galen: Exactly the same with me. I wanted to be an advocate for justice, not a prostitute. I much prefer writing and teaching. Finding the girls was great news, indeed.

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  3. Finding these girls was great news. Now the circus will begin. You are so right. It is unfortunate that we don't have Legal Precedent and a Bill of Rights to look to so that we would know how to proceed from here... Egads.

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    1. Robin: Oh, we have them, but they were warped in favor of the criminals. We want individual rights, but we need some common sense as well.

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  4. The kids are getting the change they voted for. Now upon graduating from high school, the decision is a life of crime or further education. I think there would be more opportunity for advancement, better benefits, job security and protection in the crime choice.

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  5. Really enjoyed the post. I'm glad I followed you over from Susan's blog. We share the same viewpoint on the legal system, and I liked your clever way of expressing yours today.

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    1. Maryann: Thank you so much. I sure hope the system changes for the sake of my children and grandchildren.

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  6. Amendment number six is perfect. Wish our system was like that.

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    1. Alex: We have it - on paper.

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  7. I'm with Susan. Then: Innocent, till proven guilty? Guilty, until proven innocent? We don't need a brick smashed on our heads on this one, BUT under amendment 6: In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right . . . to have the Assistance of Counsel for his defence.[3]
    The assistance of counsel clause includes, as relevant here, five distinct rights: the right to counsel of choice, the right to appointed counsel, the right to conflict-free counsel, the effective assistance of counsel, and the right to represent oneself pro se.' (Wikipedia). The right to council doesn't seem to be covered on IO--here, on earth, therein lies the rub--prosecuting attorney versus criminal defence attorney--in this case. What about the case brought against the innocent?

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    1. Linda: The 6th Amendment doesn't say that. Wikipedia, a non-credible source in academia, does. The 6th Amendment says:

      "In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the State and district wherein the crime shall have been committed, which district shall have been previously ascertained by law, and to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; to be confronted with the witnesses against him; to have compulsory process for obtaining witnesses in his favor, and to have the Assistance of Counsel for his defence."

      That is the point of my post. The activist courts have "interpreted" those items you list, which had previously worked fine for over 200 years. Then, in the 1960s, the Supreme Court changed most of those interpretations. The 6th Amendment as written provides adequate protection for the innocent. While reasonable citizens on any planet can argue interpretation, taking five years to get a case to court because the accused claims he is temporarily insane because he ate too many Twinkies makes a mockery of the Constitution. That's why we no longer have the America we once enjoyed.

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  8. Funny, IO is the only fun thing I remember from my one astronomy course that made me realize astronomy was a lot of math in disguise... anyway, I sometimes get told I live in my own world. Maybe I belong in yours...

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    1. Jasmine: At least my world is one of peace.

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  9. I was very sad to hear of this story and I cant believe the girls were not heard by neighbours before this time a deeply sad story I only hope they can recover their lifes now and gain some peace and happiness. I hope they lock him up and throw away the key see how it feels the death penalty would beto good for him make him suffer as he did them, dee

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    1. Dee: Sad is the appropriate word. Everyone should have peace and happiness in life.

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  10. The word "monster" is too soft for the "man" who did this. But people who defend these monsters in any way make me sick.

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    1. Julia: It just blows my mind how we as a society make excuses for them. Also, in my opinion, the person who did this is NOT a man. He is a monster.

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